Maybe you should be an English major. At least, you get to read stuff that’s written by people who can write! You don’t have to do anything to be an English major, you don’t need any special talent, you just have to pay attention to what someone wants you to see – to what makes someone angriest or the most excited in some other way. It’s so easy; I think that’s why there are so many English majors.
– A Prayer for Owen Meany, John Irving